In most parts of the world, telling your spouse, “I am going to meet my ex this weekend,” is a fairly efficient way to turn a peaceful Sunday into a deadly fight. In the mountains of northern Vietnam, however, meeting a former lover can be part of an annual cultural tradition. Welcome to Khau Vai Love Market, a gathering that has been bringing people together, and sometimes back to people from their past, for more than a century.
The Vietnamese Love Market Where Married Couples Meet Their Exes
Held every year on the 27th day of the third lunar month, the market takes place in Khau Vai, a mountain commune in what was historically Hà Giang Province and is now part of Tuyên Quang following Vietnam’s administrative changes. Despite its name, this is not a traditional market for buying and selling goods. It was a place for people with unfinished love stories to find each other again.
The story behind it begins with Ba, a Nùng man, and Út, a Giáy woman, who fell in love despite opposition from their communities. Their relationship reportedly led to conflict between the two groups, eventually forcing them apart. Before separating, they made a promise: they would return to Khau Vai once every year to see each other.
The love story became the legend behind the market, which was established in 1919, according to a report by Tuyên Quang’s provincial newspaper. And here is where Khau Vai gets fascinating. Some people who return to the market are already married. Vietnamese tourism authorities describe married couples arriving together and then going their separate ways to meet former partners.
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Khau Vai Love Market Is Not About Rekindling Romance
There is traditionally no expectation that these encounters will lead to rekindled romances. Instead, they are about talking, remembering, sharing what happened during the years apart and acknowledging a relationship that once mattered.
It is an idea that feels almost radical in the age of “block, delete, unfollow.”
One commenter on a viral post about the tradition wrote, “Love doesn’t need to be forgotten.” Another, clearly less enthusiastic about the concept, asked the question many modern couples probably would: “Do they?”
The market itself, meanwhile, has grown beyond former lovers. It now features traditional music, folk games, handicrafts, local food, cultural ceremonies and performances by the region’s ethnic communities. Visitors can also experience activities such as folk singing, weaving, flute-making and traditional games.
The tradition was officially recognised as a National Intangible Cultural Heritage of Vietnam in 2021, cementing its place as more than an intriguing travel story.
And yes, that is what makes Khau Vai so memorable. It does not romanticise getting back together. Instead, it leaves room for accepting that a person can belong to your past without becoming irrelevant to your story.
And, apparently, you can even put that reunion on the calendar.
Cover Image Courtesy: izitourvn/X
FAQs
What is the Khau Vai Love Market?
The Khau Vai Love Market is an annual cultural gathering in northern Vietnam where people, including married couples, traditionally meet former lovers and old friends.
Why do married couples meet their exes at Khau Vai Love Market?
The tradition is not primarily about rekindling relationships. Former lovers meet to talk, remember their shared past and acknowledge a relationship that once mattered.
When is the Khau Vai Love Market held?
The market is traditionally held every year on the 27th day of the third lunar month.
